Getting up is easy. Getting to work can be hard.
I’m a light sleeper, waking up multiple times throughout the night. At some point (and this happens every night), my back starts to hurt. That’s when I know it’s time to get up, and that’s usually between 4:00 and 5:00 a.m. Exhausted from a couple days of travel, this morning was no different. There was that dull ache in my back. I rolled onto my side, my eyes sidled the clock on the nightstand (4:11 a.m.), and it was time. I pushed back the counterpane and bounced out of the bed.
I’m a morning person, so getting up isn’t an issue for me. I love the quiet time as I write my Morning Pages. It’s the guaranteed time of the day when I can truly hear myself think. While I’m quick to rise, I’m not always so quick to settle in at my desk and write. Most days there isn’t an issue. Others, like today, are a struggle. I just felt “off.” Do you know what I mean? There’s nothing wrong, per se. I just didn’t feel in my groove, that I was a bit out of sorts, like I was spinning. In a word: I was restless.
When I’m honest with myself, I know what the problem is. I’m at a crossroads with a novel I’ve been working on. After four major rewrites, it’s still mammoth at 120,000 words. I realized after the third rewrite that I could turn this into two novels. I’m struggling to figure out where to break the story. I’ve put it aside for the moment, but mentally I haven’t let it go. And that’s holding me back, making me feel like I’m not making progress.
Feeling unsettled this morning, I went for a walk and ended up having breakfast at Atlas Espresso Bar (great coffee, by the way, for those in Toronto or those who may be visiting!). When I’m out walking, and often when I run, something magical happens: Clarity.
I’m an artist, and this morning I remembered the importance of taking the longer view. Each day that I show up to write moves me forward on my creative journey. Some days I might only get down two hundred words. Other days, working in two-hour segments, I might get in three to four writing sessions. Each day’s work, no matter how big or small, is a valuable contribution to the larger body of work I’m trying to create. The important thing is that I keep at it, steady as she goes.
Taking the longer view, maybe I’ve been a little hard on myself and have let my inner critic have dominion over me. I have made progress — on this writing project and others. I’m working hard to blog regularly. I’m still producing my Twitter Fiction Tuesdays (#TwitFicTues) series. I am showing up to write every day and proving — to the world, and more importantly to myself — that I have grit.
It really is a matter of perspective. Sometimes, weathering the storm, it’s hard to see clearly the track that has been laid, how far along I’ve actually come. That’s why we can only take life one day at a time and, as artists, show up each day to do what really excites us. Let our passion fuel us, help us to love the moment in which we find ourselves, and give our very best to our work.
How is your creative journey progressing? Let me know in the comments section below.
Today’s post is inspired by the Word Press Daily Prompt: Grit
My creative journey keeps getting derailed by a dozen other concerns. I’m not at a crossroads on a novel – I’m in book two of a series of four. Showing up is my issue. Saying no to others to clear time for writing is going to be my downfall yet.
Thanks for some positive attitude! Good luck with your projects
Hi Paul,
Learning to say no to others can be hard; it was something I struggled with for years. I worried that it made me look selfish until I realized I had to be “selfish” if I wanted to achieve my writing goals.
Sometimes we have to put ourselves, and our writing, first. It doesn’t mean that we don’t care about others, but it shows we do care about our writing. For me, putting my writing first often means getting up early or (and this is harder for me) staying up late. But then I know I can give to others without feeling resent. It’s about balance, and it’s a daily struggle.
I hope you find the best balance for you. Best of luck as you continue your creative journey!
Marcus
I envy your ability to bounce out of bed! I do this also, but it is anything but effortless! After nearly a decade working at night, it doesn’t matter how much I love the morning—my body would rather stay asleep!
It is interesting to me that you’re considering splitting your 120k into two novels. I thought hard and long about splitting my 140k into 3 books, but ultimately decided to let it be. It’s already written in 3 parts, but I realized it’s most powerful as a whole.
Side note: 120k is long, but not *so* long! I understand why the sweet spot is 70-100k for a novel, but I often prefer them longer if they’re interesting. It’s more time to spend with characters we as readers fall in love with, right?
Keep on making that incremental progress. Great things wait ahead!
I have days when it can be a struggle to get out of bed, but even if I get to bed at midnight I’ll wake up by 7 a.m. It can make for a long day!
The book was originally written in four parts. You’re right … 120k isn’t that long, but I’m still building up my readership as a new indie author. I want to earn their trust, and keep them coming back for more. I think I can do that with books that are roughly 65k (that’s my sweet spot and that length helps me to keep the writing tight). I think it’s too early for me to try a Norman Mailer-type novel like The Executioner’s Song.
Yes, let’s both keep making incremental progress. Great things await us both. Hope your week is going well.
So nice to find you, Marcus, oh so far away from Boca Raton, land of perfectly groomed everything! Please, please give yourself that much earned credit for showing up, as that seems to be the hardest part. To write for one or two hours is excellent. Then, take a physical break to reward and rejuvenate. I teach privately, working with kids with learning differences, mostly in the after school hours, for many years. So, my witching hour of creativity comes usually after most of the world is asleep. Amazingly so, sometimes it hits me, as my head hits the pillow and I allow my mind to fully relax. Being up in the wee hours doesn’t foster a good workout, in the gym, the next day…lol. I will check back to your blog, for continued motivation. I thank you and your responders, for sharing. I think what I walk away with, most importantly, is your concept of ‘Grit.’ When I am on, I am unstoppable. I will write GRIT on my whiteboard to keep me motivated and share it with my students. Keep up your great inspiring work! A pleasure to read you:)
Looking forward…
Feel free to visit me @ https://www.TutoringByToni
My best,
T.
Hi Toni,
You’re absolutely right: we have to give ourselves credit for showing up. And, in the past few years especially (as I get older), I’ve realized just how important it is to take a physical break to reward and rejuvenate. I’ve been up early this morning writing, and I’ll head out for a run shortly (to avoid the heat and humidity that the day promises).
As your “witching hour of creativity” (love that phrase!) comes after most are sleeping, mine comes a few hours before the world is waking up. Sometimes getting up early makes me more of a zombie later in the day, and can making running feel harder than it is, but the important thing is that we just keep at it. That’s our grit shining through.
I will definitely stop by your website. And keep up your fabulous work with the kids.
All the best,
Marcus
Hi Marcus!
Wow! I just discovered your post. How wonderful to find you, again! Yes, sending you much credit! I’ve embraced the notion that some days we only get one or two things done on our ‘To Do’ list. Perhaps, I should change the title of my list to ‘Hope To Do Today’…and then at the bottom of the list, note an attainable, joyous reward. It helps us to stay in the positive, when we give ourselves credit for our efforts. It ensures a smile, that can then be shared with others.
When my kids come to be for educational coaching and academic support, I always suggest we do the hardest HW/project/test prep first. This way, they can feel confident and accomplished, and certainly less stress or anxiety, by the time they leave.
Thank you, so very much, for your kind response. I love how this crazy world, of the internet, makes this ‘oh so far away’ communication possible, with a total stranger. I always say life is all about making connections with people. The door opens and all sorts of possibilities present. When the heart is open, the impossibilities become more achievable and appreciated.
I have a feeling that this will be a ‘zombie’ day of sorts, as I don’t think REM was self-achieved, with any great length. I will think of you, as I access my grit.
I hope writing, life and running are all to your satisfaction.
Please remind me how ‘this’ initiated. Did I find you on twitter?…oh so happy:)
Sending you my best,
Cheers!
T.
Tutoring By Toni, Inc..
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Hi Toni,
Thanks for writing. I hope your day wasn’t too zombie-like and you crossed off a few tasks on your ‘Hope-To-Do’ list. It’s a great way to look at what we want to accomplish in a day.
Like your approach with your kids, I set out to do the most important things first. Sometimes life distracts us, but when we at least put in the effort, I find we end up making progress.
It is a crazy world, and the internet is great for bringing complete strangers together. It’s amazing. And, yes, I believe this all began because you found me on Twitter.
Life is crazy. As I write, I’m sitting in a Norwegian restaurant in London, UK. Life is crazy, but life is good! I just sent my manuscript to be proofread …getting closer to publication!
Wishing you the best and I hope all is well.
Marcus