There’s only one person who needs to believe in you, one person who can change the course of your destiny: You. There is no one coming to save you, no one who can write your book or start your company. Only You. And on the days you’re tired—when you feel like nothing is going right—you need to keep showing up.
Action is Belief
I don’t know why, but for years I told myself that I didn’t want to run a marathon. “No interest,” is what I told myself and anyone who asked if I’d planned to run one. In reality, though, that ‘no interest’ was just fear wearing a disguise. I didn’t believe I could run a marathon and, moreover, I was terrified of making a fool of myself in public.
But when I signed up for the 2019 Toronto Waterfront Marathon, I found a training plan and committed to it. My biggest fear when I first saw the training plan was that I’d never be able to run distances that were longer than 21K. I had never run anything more than a half-marathon, but as I followed the plan I was building endurance. Rain or shine, cool or humid, I had to keep showing up. And that consistent action eventually created the belief that I could do it.
When Everything Isn’t All Right
More than a decade after the publication—and flop—of my first novel, I look at it more as one of my greatest life lessons than a failure. But at the time, I was frustrated and discouraged. Worst of all, I doubted myself as a writer and stopped submitting my writing for publication. And for several months, the only writing I did was my Morning Pages.
As important as actions are for unsticking in the moment, they’re critical for building habits that make getting stuck less likely in the long run. Thinking or feeling the same thing every day is useful, but doing the same thing every day is much more likely to endure.1
In a way, I needed to time “grieve” the failure and figure out a way to regroup. I finally came to realize that I had to keep showing up. While it wasn’t the result I’d hoped for, I reminded myself that I had had success having already published numerous short stories, poems, and essays. Amidst all the other rejections, this was, really, just another one (although it hurt a little bit more). And if I wanted to publish another book, the only way to make that dream come true was to keep showing up. So, I did, and got back into my habit of writing every day.
Keep Showing Up
I’ve been running for over fifteen years, and during that time I’ve had to deal with multiple injuries and setbacks. I’ve been writing even longer, navigating a sea of rejection and disappointments. But in both cases, I keep showing up on the days I feel like writing and running and the days that I don’t. Because it’s the only way to build momentum and keep moving forward. And, as the saying goes, nothing will work unless you do.
In case no one has told you today, you are loved, you are worth, and you matter. And you don’t need anyone’s permission to be—wholly and unapologetically—who you are.
- Alter, A. (2023). Anatomy of a Breakthrough: How to Get Unstuck When It Matters Most, Simon & Schuster Paperbacks, New York, p. 221. [↩]
Leave a Reply