I like quiet. And solitude. And when you work in an environment surrounded by extroverts, that gets a lot of raised eyebrows. I don’t participate in the idle chitchat that often transcends into gossip. Over the years, I’ve discovered that the best thing to do—for me—is to keep to myself. That makes me self-contained. It doesn’t matter what others think or say. And that brings me to this reminder: be yourself.
Your Life, Your Way
In Courage is Calling: Fortune Favours the Brave, Ryan Holiday opens the section of fear with the story of Florence Nightingale.1 In the most simplest of terms, Nightingale—battling against the opinions and expectations of others—left a life of privilege for a life of service. It is, for me, an inspiring example of what it means to be yourself.
It’s why I’m working harder to do more of what I love, which is writing. There were people who told me I was foolish to be a writer, to not say anything ‘stupid.’ I wrote anyway. Because I knew that writing was my calling, the way I could impact the world in some way. And I haven’t given up on it. Even after my first book flopped or when sales have slowed, I kept writing. Every day that I show up and put pen to the page (I still write most first drafts by hand), I’m being myself.
Be Yourself
We all grow up facing pressure from others about who they want us to be or how we should be. And a lot of people have an opinion—usually unsolicited—about what we should do and how we should do it. When we go against the grain and step into something that others consider ‘unsafe,’ the pressure mounts to stick with what’s normal and safe.
Being safe doesn’t get you very far in life. What it gets you is that you end up being like everyone else. How will you feel, as you draw your last breath, if you didn’t do what was in your heart? If you acquiesce to the status quo? If you abandon your vision for your life? Life is short. And I believe that the best way to have a happier life is to have the courage to simply, and unapologetically, be yourself.
So, I’ll leave you with this thought from Courage is Calling: “Because the courage to be different is the courage to think different, to see what others don’t see, to hear what others don’t hear.”2
Oh…let me remind you first that you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter. And I must say it one more time: you do not need anyone’s permission to be—unapologetically—who you are.
And today, I want to leave you with this last thought…
You are loved, you are worthy, and you matter. And, best of all, you do not need anyone’s permission to be—unapologetically—who you are.
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