What I love about life is that it’s not linear. There are mountains to climb and valleys to wade through. There are times of progression, when life is smooth and calm and just right. But there are, also, periods of regression, when I stand on the precipice of defeat. Not sure how—or if—I can soldier on. These phases are reminders that life is a journey. And through all the detours and ‘disruptions,’ we must hold steadfast to our dreams.
The In-Between
For some time now, I’ve been caught in an in-between state, trapped somewhere between the summit and the valley. I know that I’m off my game and in need of change, but I’m uncertain as to how to proceed. There’s an unshakeable restlessness enveloping me, pulling me away from what matters. It’s harder to get out in the morning for a run, harder to sit still long enough to write. And then I’m left asking myself, What’s the matter with me?
When you’re in that in-between state, it is hard to hold steadfast to your dreams—to give yourself the grace to rest. I’m trying not to be too hard on myself. There has been a lot of change in my life over the past four months, and it has left me wiped. Despite everything that has happened, I [foolishly] believe that I should still be able to be a high performer. I am, perhaps involuntarily, still trying to live up to other people’s expectations.
Hold Steadfast to Dreams
There’s a lot of clatter in the world, and when that gets inside my head it’s hard for me to stay centred. That is when, unexpectedly, I lose sight of my why and what I hold dear. If I want to honour who I am, I must find a way back to myself. And that’s by taking it one day at a time. To show up every day and do my best, refusing to compare myself to others. To walk my own path. And to just be myself with a commitment to hold steadfast to my dreams.
Oh! I want you to know today that you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter. And you don’t need anyone’s permission to be—wholly and unapologetically—who you are.
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