What’s wrong with me? The question itself raises enough red flags that I already know people will be reaching out to ask if I’m okay. Let me reassure you all, first and foremost, that I’m fine. But in this post-pandemic world, I’m curious to know if others—especially introverts—might be experiencing the same thing: greater resistance to participating in social activities. [Read more…] about What’s Wrong with Me?
do what you love
The Scary Part of Goal Setting
I’ve been consistent about setting goals and writing them down for the past three years, maybe a little longer. But there’s one thing I never did.
I never shared them.
Why?
Because I was hanging on to limiting beliefs. Afraid that people would laugh at me. Mock me. Tell me I’m crazy.
But at some point, you have to stop running from yourself. I had to stop running from myself.
If there’s one thing I took away from Gary John Bishop’s Unfu*k Yourself, it’s this: “I am not my thoughts; I am what I do.”
There are, for me, two parts to “I am what I do.” One, I am a writer. That is what I do. No other job in this world will give me the high or a stronger sense of purpose and self. Second, showing up every day to write, and to share it with the world is also what I do. If I don’t do any of those things, if I don’t take action, then there’s no possible way I can achieve my dreams.
[Read more…] about The Scary Part of Goal Setting
2020: Imperfectly Perfect
2020 is over. But the gift it gave us — COVID-19 — continues to impact millions around the world. Here in Ontario, we entered a province-wide lockdown on 26 December 2020. The City of Toronto has been locked down since 23 November 2020. Tough days are still ahead, but we will, together, weather this storm. I’m still hanging on to hope because, in the words of Desmond Tutu: “Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all the darkness.” [Read more…] about 2020: Imperfectly Perfect
Course Correction
When I learned to kayak, my instructor made swim the rapid. Even though I grew up with a pool in the backyard, I wasn’t a strong swimmer. And the lifejacket strapped to my body didn’t really comfort me, either. “Don’t panic. And take a big breath when the rapid shoots you out, because then it’s going to pull you back down again.” Sure enough, I panicked. Underwater, my arms flailed grandly as I tried to reach the surface. When my head popped out of the water, I took a breath — probably not as big as I should have — and then quickly disappeared underwater. When I came to the surface again, I was beyond spent and, to my dismay, headed straight for the next rapid. And I was desperately in need of a course correction. [Read more…] about Course Correction
It Wasn’t Supposed to be Like This
The last thing I wanted to do was travel during a global pandemic. The idea of being stuck on a plane for hours with others held zero appeal. In fact, just thinking about it made me even more anxious and paranoid. But on 30 September, I flew to Edmonton to see a dear friend who was diagnosed with glioblastoma in August. Glioblastoma is the most common and most aggressive primary brain tumor. My friend’s diagnosis has left me in shock, and I’m asking myself a lot of questions about life and this journey. And one thought runs constantly through my mind: it wasn’t supposed to be like this.
Don’t Wait
In life, we’re always waiting for the perfect moment, the perfect opportunity that we believe will allow us to pursue a dream or goal. I hear people say, “When I retire…” or “Once I get a new job…” or “When I’ve saved ‘X’ amount…” The problem is that when we wait, we’re kind of tempting fate. We hope that when all those perfects align, we’ll take the plunge and do the thing that calls to us. But, sometimes, life has other plans for us.
So, don’t wait. Whatever you need to do, or feel compelled to do, do it now. Take one small step forward that sets you on the path to achieving your goals. It doesn’t all have to be done at once. You don’t have to wait until everything is perfect. Because it may never be.
It Wasn’t Supposed to be Like This
I had a great visit with my friend, even though it was tough to see her in pain and how tired she was after radiation therapy. (But I am forever grateful to the thoughtful and dedicated staff at the Cross Cancer Centre for their marvellous care.) We shared some great belly laughs, and tears. Quiet moments of reflection and power naps. (Falling asleep in a hospital chair can really put a kink in your neck!). Twenty-six years of friendship, we’re not just friends. We’re more like brother and sister.
And, still, that thought is ever-present: it wasn’t supposed to be like this. Yet this is the reality we face. And, if anything, it’s a wake-up call.
Don’t wait. Do what you love. Live your best life.