Marcus Lopés

LGTBQIA2S+ Author, Blogger, Runner

focus

Why the Rush? Or Why it’s Important to Go Slow

by 4 Comments

Why the rush?

Some days I can’t help but rush, even though I know I need to go slow. It usually means that I’m trying to keep the momentum of a productive day going. But rushing doesn’t get me anywhere. It does the opposite. It trips me up, leaves me spinning. And then I’m always asking the question: why the rush?

Full Throttle

why the rushAs many of you know, I’m an early bird. On November 1, I’d been up since 4:15 am, and enjoyed a productive morning of writing and running before heading to the Princess Margaret Cancer Centre to visit a friend. On the way home from the hospital, I decided to pick up fresh burgers for dinner from the Healthy Butcher on Queen Street West. They also carry homemade buns, so I wanted a couple of them, too.

I was rushing. I wanted to be home to keep the momentum going on my writing. As I picked up a bun with the tongs, trying to shove it in the bag that wouldn’t stay open, it dropped to the floor. I looked around the store, hoping no one was watching, and scrambled to pick it up with the tongs. I couldn’t do it. Each time I almost had it in the bag it fell again. Inside my head, there was an explosion of expletives. I finally got it into the bag, then went for another one. Still rushing. And, Shazam! The second bun hit the floor, too. Three attempts later, it, too, was in the bag. I drew in a deep breath, headed for the counter to pay for my purchases and then, cursing under my breath, headed home.

Why? Why the Rush?

I needed to slow down. I needed to enjoy the moment.

Chasing down a big dream or goal, I get excited when I feel the end’s in sight. But there’s something to be said for slowing down and enjoying the process. It grounds me, let’s me see what’s working and what may need to be tweaked. Better than that, slowing down reveals what me and my project can become.

Life isn’t a race. It’s a journey. Take time to enjoy it!

Do you sometimes feel like you’re rushing? Can you recognize it and slow down? Click Reply or leave a comment in the section below. I’d love to hear from you.

Momentum: 3 Ways to Keep the Momentum Going

by 1 Comment

I’m a light sleeper. Even if I take a sleep aid before bed, I wake up three or four times during the night. Tossing and turning, and a dull ache in my lower back signal that it’s time to get up. Resistance is futile. So, I roll out of bed, usually between 3:30 and 4:00 am. About fifteen minutes after my feet touch the floor, I’m seated at my desk. After an hour or so of writing, I’m heading out the door for a run. It’s all I can do to keep the momentum going.

If you’re like me, you’re trying to build your artistic career — as a writer, painter, musician, artist, entrepreneur — around a day job. It’s not easy. Sometimes it feels like the job that pays the bills, and allows you to do what you love, is getting in the way. Especially when you feel like you’re on the cusp of finishing a large project.

Currently, I’m rewriting a manuscript, the last round of self-editing before having my novel professionally edited. Yet every time I go to work, which takes me out of the country for three days, the rewrite grinds to a halt. I start to think, “I’m never going to finish this” or “Do I really think I can pull this off?” The momentum that had been building starts to ebb.

But I need to keep going, need to get right back to the work, need to stay the course. Here are three things I do that keep the momentum moving forward.

Have a Routine

Writer at desk early in morning to get momentum going
Here I am, at my desk at 4:15 am. Love this time of the day. It’s quiet, and it helps to get the momentum going.

If I’m not at home in Toronto, then I’m usually in London (UK) for work. I have a routine for both cities that keeps me writing and my projects on track. I get up early, at home and in London. It’s especially challenging in London when getting up at 6:00 am local time is 1:00 am in Toronto. I aim to do my most important work first because I’m at my best creatively in the morning. I said I try. Sometimes life interrupts. I run [almost] daily because it helps quiet my mind, gets me into a zone. I come back to my writing refreshed. And running keeps me active.

A routine keeps you grounded. If you don’t have a routine yet, try getting into one. The results will surprise you.

Finish Something

Nothing energizes me more than finishing a short story or novel. Sometimes I’m tempted to step away from a project when a new idea pops into my mind, but I don’t. I’ve learned instead to keep notes on new ideas and go back to them when my current project is complete. Then I’ll be in a better mindset to also assess the validity of a new idea.

Finishing something offers reassurance, when doubt lingers large and heavy, that you’re in fact on the right path. It’s a reminder that you’ve heeded the call of what it is you feel compelled to do in life. Finishing something reinforces the artist in us all. It says, loud and clear, “I’m an artist, hear me roar!”

Believe

I believe in myself. I believe in myself as a writer who’ll succeed. And that belief holds me accountable, sends me daily to the page. It does something else, too. It holds fear at bay.

Believe in yourself and your talent as an artist. Believe that you can and will do great things. In such a competitive world, we must be our greatest champion.

Forward Momentum

These three things (and there are others, too) keep the momentum going, setting me up for success. And that’s why I take to heart the words of Audre Lorde: “When I dare to be powerful — to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid.”

How do you keep the momentum going on your creative projects? Do you have a routine? Hit Reply or leave a comment in the section below. I’d love to hear from you.

Do What You Love

by 7 Comments

If there is one thing in this life that we must do, it is this: Do What You Love!

Do What You Love is not just a trite adage. When used as a powerful guiding principle, it can transform your life. I know.

The Backstory

I spent a good chunk of my adult life running away from what I love, from who I am. I did what I was ‘supposed’ to do. I went to university, earned a degree and then found a job. I didn’t exactly work in my field of study, which was French Literature. But living in Ottawa, the nation’s capital, being bilingual made the search for decent work easier.

I worked in what was, for me, the grizzly world of nine to five. Policy Analyst. Executive Assistant. Proofreader. Program Coordinator. Project Administrator (Consultant). No matter how fancy the title or good the pay, boredom quickly set in. I never adjusted well (and I don’t think I have yet) to doing the same tasks over and over again, in a tiny cubicle, with the same people. It didn’t inspire.

Maybe, too, I didn’t subscribe to the idea of the Canadian dream — owning a nice house, having lots of money, fame and recognition. I believed, and still do, that we should hard work, be determined and live a happy and fulfilled life. So, whenever the nine-to-five world became too ‘restrictive,’ I saw a simple cure: Change jobs. I did. Frequently. But it was never long before the excitement of the new job and work environment waned. Then I’d reach the point of loathing the work and taking regular ‘mental health’ days.

Diagnosing the Problem

A story of love, loss and obsession that will leave you wondering if there’s such a thing as second chances. Available on Amazon.

The problem was simple. When it came to Do What You Love, I was failing miserably. Well, I was and I wasn’t.

I’m a writer. It’s what drives me, gives me a reason to get out of bed. I’m always excited to begin each day by setting pen to the page as I write my Morning Pages. I really can’t remember a time when I wasn’t writing. But for a long time, I let myself be shamed out of writing. People — family, friends, colleagues — told me I’d never make it as a writer. That all artists were drug and/or alcohol addicts. Have it as a hobby on the side. Get a real job.

When I kept writing on the side and got a ‘real job,’ I was mis-er-able. Looking back at the three most difficult times in my life — when I was actually clinically depressed and on medication — I was barely writing. I was doubting my work, doubting my talent, doubting my dreams. I’d lost sight of what mattered … and that had to change.

The Transformation

In 2003, I stopped being ashamed of my writing dreams. I started to submit my work, and it was published. I made time for writing — before my soporific day job, during my lunch hour and before bed. Jobs came and went, but my writing held steady. That was when I noticed the shift. Making my writing a priority, I wasn’t miserable. The good days were like being on the open water when it’s smooth sailing, the winds are calm, and your destination is clearly in your sights. And on the bad days — when the tempest roared, and it felt like I had to fight for my very survival — writing took the pain away.

I still have a day job, but it’s not nine to five. Do I love what I do as much as writing? Absolutely not. But I’ve found a way to ‘love’ it because it lets me do what I love. Write. If I’d been in any other job over the past five and a half years, it would have taken a lot longer to have my books published.

Do What You Love + Courage = Hope

Maybe you want to be the mayor of your city, found a non-profit that focuses on creativity for adolescents with mental health issues, open your own B&B… Whatever your dream, doing it takes courage. Taking that first step in the direction of your dream — despite the odds or what others say — gives you hope. Hope for today. Hope for tomorrow. Hope for the life you’ve always dreamed of living.

Let’s make the choice to walk through life with our eyes wide open, with our hearts tuned to what makes them tick.

Are you doing what you love? Click Reply and let me know. I’d love to hear from you!

Stay Focused

by Leave a Comment

I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t scared. Actually, I’m terrified. That’s because in four days my next book, Everything He Thought He Knew, will be released on Amazon. While it’s available for pre-order now, it’s not technically out in the world for public consumption. I’ve been here before — the waiting, the anticipation, the anxiousness. Will readers like it? Hate it? What kind of reviews will it get? Those are things, I know, that are out of my control. I have to stay focused. Then why am I scared? Because I must keep going. The publication of this novel is part of a larger dream. Chasing down that dream means I need to keep writing, get to work on the next book. I must stay focused.

It’s been a long journey filled with success, failure, joy and disappointment. And through it all, I’ve kept going. Because I have a dream. (I shared my experience in writing Everything He Thought He Knew in my last blog post, “The Story Behind the Story.”)

As 10 October (the launch date for Everything He Thought He Knew) nears, it’s been harder to stay focused. It’s not an unusual feeling. It happens every time I finish a big project. No matter how hard I try to move forward, I feel like I’m spinning. I look at the writing projects piled on my desk and don’t know how to begin. I write my to-do list and prioritize what’s most important. Yet at the end of the day I only check off one or two items. And not necessarily the important ones! I just can’t seem to sit still long enough to get anything substantial done.

Do Not Surrender

Feeling stuck, like I’m spinning out of control, can be disastrous if I surrender to it … let it have dominion. It’s the precursor to procrastination. And even worse, Resistance. To beat back Resistance, I must go back to basics. For me, that means holding strong to my “5 Rules to Live By.” It means — and sometimes I forget this — that I must do my most important creative work first. And when I show up to work, even if I only write a couple of hundred words or edit a few pages, I remind myself that that’s progress. One more time, I’ve shown Resistance the door. I haven’t surrendered.

Do Nothing

Sunday morning run on 7 October 2018. Stopped at the midway point of a 13k run to capture the view of Toronto.

I am forever learning the art of work and play. Life is rich with all its beauty and with so many things to discover. Writing is very important to me, to my life, and each day I write I’m inching closer to realizing my dreams. But when I can’t focus, I know that it’s life speaking to me. And the message is this: take a break. Life isn’t, and shouldn’t be, all about writing. So, yesterday I decided to ‘take a day off.’ I binge-watched Deep State, starring Mark Strong. Loved it! But there was still a part of me that felt guilty, that inner voice that chastised me for not working.

But I know that doing nothing did me good. It stops me from always looking to the future and where I want to be. It grounds me in the present, in the now. Taking time to rest lets my body and mind recharge. It allows me to come back and tackle my writing projects with a new vigour and see their worth (or lack thereof) from a new perspective.

Gaining Traction

I’m slowly starting to gain traction. I’m settling back into a routine. Most importantly, I’m letting myself be a beginner again. Not every day is going to be perfect. Sometimes it’s going to feel like I’m writing uphill. There will be times when the writing feels stale and rigid, but I remind myself that it’s only a draft … nothing that can’t be fixed. Other days, still, will remind me of a bad run: I’ll cramp up, have to slow it down and rest, but I’ll keep going.

Stay focused. It’s the best way I’ve learned to weather the storm. And then something magical happens: I finish something. That offers reassurance, when doubt lingers large and heavy, that I am on the right path. I am not necessarily at the beginning or the end, but somewhere in between. That is the artist in me holding steadfast to my dreams.

The Art of Keeping On

by Leave a Comment

The road is often long, filled with sharp, unexpected turns that almost send us tumbling. Some days we struggle to climb the mountain and its treacherous terrain. Other days we soar, feeling like nothing and no one can stop us — that anything and everything is possible. I like those days the best! Yet no matter what we face, no matter how daunting it may seem … we, as artists, keep on keeping on.

It’s an exciting time for me. I’m getting close to publishing my next novel, Everything He Thought He Knew. I now have an amazing cover (sneak peek to the right) thanks to Lieu Pham at Covertopia. The proof of the print edition arrived yesterday, and it looks great. The eBook edition is being formatted. It’s all coming together. Finally.

When it comes to Everything He Thought He Knew, the road has definitely been long, hard and, at times, seemingly impossible. It’s not just, as it started out to be, a ‘revised edition’ of Freestyle Love (published in 2011 by Lazy Day Publishing). It turned out to be a top-to-bottom rewrite of the story, with the central premise still intact. I had done a substantial rewrite of the original manuscript (Freestyle Love) before having it edited by thEditors. I thought, in hindsight naively, that I had nailed it. Until I received the manuscript back from my editor.

It wasn’t that it was a bad story or that the writing was mediocre. My editor did what he does best: he pointed out the problems with the character and plot development, story arc, structure, continuity, et. al. And he wasn’t wrong. And that sent me spinning and back to the drawing board. I got to work and hunkered down. What I thought would be a rather smooth and fast rewriting process took a lot longer than I had imagined. (According to my Master Projects List, I started working on this book 21 February 2017.) For a time, that had me down — wondering if I could actually get through the rewrite and publish the book.

What’s the Point?

I wanted to learn from my earlier mistakes and get this book ‘right,’ make it better than the first. So, I sent the manuscript back for another round of editing, which meant another round of revisions (but much less than the first go-round). Some days it was hard to see the progress I was making. That had me feeling down again. As much as I try not to compare myself with others, I sometimes feel frustrated watching other writers put out two or three books a year. I wonder what I’m doing ‘wrong,’ why I feel like I’m always lagging behind. Then that has me asking myself, “What’s the point?”

But the point is that — despite the challenges, the disappointments, the days I feel like I’ve lost my footing — I still show up to write. I resign from competition. I keep the end goal in sight and press on. That is, to me, the art of keeping on: with persistence and courage, doing the thing we are called to do and, every day, heeding that call.

What goal(s) are you trying to achieve? Are you determined to keep on keeping on? Let me know in the comments section below.